NZTA clearly don't read the papers

I was at work the other day and on the table at lunch was a copy of the Bay of Plenty Times, the local newspaper for Tauranga. A couple of stories caught my eye. The first related to this piece of 'construction' (sorry can't find the link to the actual story). Anyway, if you drive or cycle this way you will see that $3.6 million is being spent demolishing a large hill to fill a valley to straighten a section of road that, according to NZTA, RDC and the Bay of Plenty Times is 'an accident blackspot'.

Great work you would think? Well possibly not. Turn over the page in the paper and there was another story highlighting there were 1400 serious crashes in the WBOP region last year, but guess what, less than 140 were caused by the conditions, the quality of the road or a defective vehicle.

So $3.6 million (and I bet it goes over that) to make a small section of road faster, which will in turn mean that the bendy sections after this new part, will become the new accident blackspots - so money well spent? The logging trucks will get to Tauranga a minute quicker?

Maybe the $3.6 million could be spent on measures to decrease motor vehicle usage, public transport, cycle lanes, etc - not whilst the car is still king!

A Few of my Least Favourite Things

Why exactly does it need a double axle? Don't they realise chrome went out years ago?

This one is endorsed by a Texan country music star - say no more!

The whole purpose of this blog was to enable me to get off my chest the annoyances that really grate me. I have been thinking about this for some time and decided to do a top ten of my least favourite things. This list will probably not surprise many who know me, and indeed it is not probably reflective of the level at which each of these things actually annoy me.

Anyway, I’ll start with this one – the American truck.

I could have focused purely on American cars – why? Because they are shite! They don’t look nice, are badly built, handle badly, etc. But that would be isolate the biggest part of the problem, the big Tonka truck monstrosities.

Let us consider them in detail. Firstly, they are gross, too big for NZ roads, in fact they are too big for most roads. They are fuel inefficient, designed, no doubt, for carrying buffalo that you have just shot on the plain, not for cruising around towns in the central north island. With their duff duff V8’s and chronic auto transmission they look foolish pulling away at traffic lights.

Why do people drive them? Who knows – the inadequacy in the trouser department theory springs to mind (big car to compensate for small manhood). Of course, they always have the fog lights on and have mirrors that would not look out of place on a Scania.

What is even more bizarre is what they actually buy - the list of their best sellers is quite comical! Taste, what taste?

So there, it’s out – I hate Yank pick up trucks!!

And then there was five….

As a follow on to my comments the other day comes this – the third fatality from Sunday’s crash, rapidly followed by another incident, this time caused by a less than diligent motorist forcing a cyclist to take evasive action simply because they did not pay enough attention to other road users as they exited their car.

Add to this another story – fortunately not another death (that’s five cyclists killed in four days by the way!) – where a lovely motorist forces a rider into the kerb, causes them to crash, breaking their collar bone and then telling them it was their fault. I too have had the same thing happen to me (minus the injury). I slapped a van once to alert them they were about to grind me into the pavement, only for the driver to stop me a few km along the road to ask what my problem was and to advise he would rip my head off if I touched his lovely van again!

Now, in the last blog I complained about the driving standards – last night I had ANOTHER near miss, rural, female driver, lack of attention, etc. It makes you wonder if you are on borrowed time riding a bike.

Another weekend of CARnage

It’s official, being a cyclist in New Zealand is as fun as being a crash test dummy – a dangerous existence not helped by the low quality vehicles on the road (in terms of safety features and serviceability) and the atrocious driving standards.

Last night I was enjoying a leisurely ride with my mate Pete; this involved a trip around the mountain, mainly flat with a steep climb at the end followed by a rapid descent where you can easily (as we did) touch 70kmh. Great fun, until at the only T junction on the road, out ‘drives’ (actually Kangaroos, jumps, stutters or hops might be better descriptions) a white car with young female Maori driver. Avoiding action was required and luckily for Pete and I there was not any on coming traffic as we overtook the silly cow at over 60kmh.

Now I can hear you say “but you were reckless in your actions’!

Well, the speed limit there is 70kmh and we were both under this; we were both wearing hi-vis gear and were, unlike the car driver, paying attention. Furthermore, we had right of way, the car failed  to give way and frankly appeared not to give a toss about the near miss she had just been involved in (we could have conceivably rear ended her, but this would have hurt!).

So fortunately Pete and are not statistics, unlike those less fortunate than us this weekend. Three cyclists were struck and killed by cars this weekend. In this article there is an overview of the two incidents (two others were killed last week, making five in a fortnight); now I am obviously biased – as I biker I have had several near misses, last night being the most recent. I also appreciate that the media has to produce stories that balance reporting. But please, the poor car driver (who hit the cyclists so hard she had to be cut from the vehicle), is very distressed! She is a farmers daughter who lives in a nearby farm, the cyclists are on a regular, organised Sunday ride – so, why was she on the wrong side of the road, given that she knows the area, presumably knows cyclists use the road and given it is a rural area she could have hit a milk tanker, a tractor a farm bike – anything in fact! I am guessing because she could, because motorists really only care for themselves and not other road users; and from the ‘gross generalisation’ file comes the next bit. Many bikers have pointed out that young female car drivers are the worst, the least attentive, the least in control, the least likely to see a cyclist and the most likely to take you out. I have deferred from having this opinion – until last night!!

Turning green

Yesterday I lost my virginity – well to be more precise my Hybrid car virginity. A work colleague took a Honda Insight out for a test drive and I hopped in for the ride. Was I impressed? Well it was very plastic inside; it was very quiet in economy mode and the little dials and stuff were impressive. Less impressive were the screams of the engine as it supplemented the system as we climbed a relatively steep hill (at 6000 rpm it reminded me of an electric drill on full power). This got me thinking when in the shower this morning.

The first thought was have I turned green; quite by chance I haven’t eaten any meat for nearly two days, so I must have reduced my carbon footprint considerably, seeing as the production of meat is one of the most energy consuming activities going (as is the refrigeration used to keep it in an edible state). However, the lengthy shower where I have these thoughts probably makes up for any savings.

I also got to thinking about renewable energy sources. I had seen the previous day that the proposed Severn Barrage had been cancelled in favour of several nuclear power stations. As a kid I loved nuclear, it was modern age, it was a symbol of power and it seemed all too good to be true – that was before Three Mile Island and Chernobyl – as an adult I am far more cautious.

Now I can understand that there are ecological reasons behind the cancellation, but are there as big ecological reasons as nuclear waste or accidental radiation release? It is about time governments started selling their green credentials a bit more and actually looked at renewable's in a more proactive manner.

Gross generalisations…. Part Two

After last weeks pointing out of the inane but confusing here are a couple of others.   

Why do people buy hideously coloured cars – egg yolk yellow springs to mind, generally on Mitzi Evo’s, over accessorised Ford’s, etc. In general they also seem to sport ‘bling’ and awful clothes?

Similarly, but oddly different, are those who choose the ‘Ute’ as their ride – again, a gross generalisation, but they are either ‘Rock Chick’ or ‘Bogan’. For those unfamiliar with the term bogan this is what I mean. With no taste in cars, alcoholic beverages, music or sport, this species is highly prevalent, especially in the central north island, Waikato and Manawatu

A typical young, pre-beard bogan

A bogan with their plumage removed

Classic bogan

Gross generalisations....

First in a series of I don’t know how many…. I guess this was somewhat inspired by those ‘people of Walmart’ pictures, the train wrecks of life, obese cross dressers, fat women in short skirts, the mis-shapen, the child neglecters, etc…..

Anyway, I frequently have to walk through Rotorua Central Mall, as it is where my work is located. To describe it as a ‘mall’ is a bit misleading, it is a collection of shops, with an enclosed food court, but mainly open to the elements. From my observation today I bring you generalisation number one -

If, as alleged, smoking helps to keep you thin and/or suppresses your appetite, why is it that all people sat on their butts out side the food court, engaging in the self destruction called smoking are in excess of 100kg – and that is the women, not the men, they are even larger?

This links to generalisation two –

Why is it that shop security people are so big that they could not possibly chase any sticky fingered youth? Is it a pre-requisite for the job?

And to close today observations

It would appear that the ability to use a cars indicators in inversely proportional to the size or volume of the exhaust – e.g. if you have a big bore ‘muffler’ (contradiction in terms) you can’t use your indicators – probably as your seat is so far reclined you can barely reach the steering wheel!

Car, designers and ugliness - is beauty really in the eye of the beholder?

OK, time for a rant. What is it with car designers? Most cars look like clones of each other, individuality seems completely void these days, so with that thought in mind you would think that the esoteric designs on the road would make me feel much happier. Well, to put it bluntly, no!

What was going through the mind of the designer of this?

It isn't an off road vehicle, it isn't a saloon. It could be a hatchback, but it isn't a sports car - I've figured it out - it's quite simply SHIT! Bulbous, ugly, over priced and driven by women dripping in jewelry whilst they pick up little Timmy from day care.

As if one German car maker producing an arse of a car was not enough, the designers of the most recognisable sports cars ever produce this abomination!

Generally found in black, again driven by people with more money than sense, it also defies logic. Would you really take this off road? Does it perform like a 911?  Do you really want to look like a South central Gangsta rapper? Why, oh why?